stay tuned this is a woman on the move who is tired of living a life of excuses and is going to do something about it, whatever it takes (nothing that breaks my moral code of course) My life, my struggles to get out of debt, getting healthy and not knowing what's next. trying to figure it all out. anyway I can

Another great weekend got a lot accomplished still more to do, purging the past is very cathartic needed to do time to move on into my future. Cleaned out my closet, got rid a ton of old papers and letters and stuff. tomorrow task is my shelves.  I forgot to take a before pic of my closet or the ensuing disaster that occurred when I emptied all the contents of the closet into the room.   I could show the after I guess.

That’s how I clean I empty the object in it’s entirety then I sort then, I purge, yep I watched a lot of home organization shows.  You won’t see me on hoarders.  Clutter Anonymous maybe but not hoarders, I have no space for my stuff and mom’s well she has the rest of the apartment lol.  She wants me though to move my books into the living room.  Because well they are Christian living books from this decade.  Hers not so much think 70’s and 80’s.   Wants our guests to think were up to date.  ( what guests, I’m not sure mom and I aren’t very social, like our space)

Starting on Day 20 tomorrow of cleanse, I say that because well I cheated tonight, wanted chips had crackers oh well new day tomorrow, not going to beat myself up over some crackers and tuna. teach me to wait so late to eat, oh that and denying a craving.  If you want something eat it in small quantities better then trying to find a substitute as I did.  I wanted chips should have just had chips.

A lot of great stuff is happening and no longer have fear as to what is next. Bring it on I’m ready.

I am still dealing with my emotions over someone close to me life imploding around them, but unfortunately bringing myself down with them won’t help me especially since I’m helpless and can do nothing but support them through it and show them that there is and will be some good of this.  I have to hold onto that belief.

My life is on the upswing well somewhat financially anyways.  I have had some great turns of events in some areas I ended up getting a portion of my income tax return back,  ( I haven’t got any $ from income tax for over 5 years they have been taking it for defaulted Student Loan even though I was making regular payments) so this was huge it shows me how close I am to being finished.  I won’t end up with as small as a debt owing as I would like but this money, right now is great timing.  I made $200 on my side job well I earned it, it hasn’t been paid yet but it will be by end of month or 1st week of April.  Found out my E.I. is being paid a little longer then I expected which means a little more breathing room to get a JOB!!.  and more money coming so no stresses about paying rent and all the bills are being paid (not in full yet, but they are getting money on them)(my bills, not mom’s) and we can use Mom’s income tax for something fun like this amazing conference at the end of April for my Church.. It’s a women’s conference and it’s being held here.  www.deerhurstresort.com.

Yes I know, and she knows we should/can be doing other things with the money but this is Mom’s treat to me and she feels I need this to recharge my batteries before I get back into the grind of the working world again.

Some people might disagree with her thought processes considering that I have been on several trips this year, but this year at times has been more stressful then working at a job, not knowing, not being healthy all the time and just the constant rejection and defeat that has happened.  My self esteem till as of late was in the dumps and at points I did sink into a depression.  So this trip is to be my launching pad into my new life of being employed and not to sound cheesy becoming the me I am supposed to be.

Looking really forward to it besides where it is being held there is going to be a Princess Ball where we get to get dressed up in ball gowns and eat great food and possibly win some great prizes and just be in the companionship of some really great women.

Start my online courses again going to keep on top of my skills and try to learn some new ones.  Best part it’s free, got them when I applied for a employment agency.  Didn’t get the job but I got access to all these great courses don’t give you any credits but it will give me knowledge so that’s great.

So yep another busy week between cleaning, courses, job search and life.  I’m a busy gal and that’s okay with me.

I’m going to learn to schedule posts for the weekend.  Lots going on in this little head. don’t know if it’s because of this past week or that finally the fog is lifting.  Whatever it is I like it and I can live with this kind of momentum if it means things are changing.  I’m tired of standing still.

Thank you and God Bless

Tina Marie.

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